feels like we're going backwards baby

Hey yo im back yall

This year has been great so far

experienced so so much 

I felt true happiness this year a lot of times.

but still i feel empty as hell

why?

when is the void in my chest ever going to be truly filled?

is it my fault for blaming everything around me?

or is it actually my own fault for being grim?

I demand for an answer please. 

PS, to this specific sun i met, you came into my life

but i feel like you did more bad than good.

i wish to say goodbye to you now sunny.

PPS, I lost myself.

PPPS, i'm on a mission to find myself back.

PPPPS, college is stressful as fuck but i'm finally getting 

real education which i'm super happy about. 

thank you parents.

PPPPPS, sometimes i want to give up and just lie on the ground and eat chips and not think about life and my future and my pilled up assignments and my bank account.

PPPPPPS, i need someone to make me feel safe.

someone who is going to tell me 

"don't worry shyne-ni, i got your back."

and really really mean what they say.

hope to see you guys in a long time lol 
(cause i rarely blog unless i'm on the edge of my sanity)